We Can't Escape Our Own

My parents and I wanted a healthy dinner yesterday so we chose Korean BBQ. Ha! Three Chinese dudes sat nearby. Two were normal; one was a Muthafuckin' Ooogly-Ass Loudmouth. All had slanty eyes and yellow skin. Two spoke in polite volumes; the M.O.A.L. made announcements.

Choice excerpts from the M.O.A.L.'s speech:

"She wouldn't shut up! I can handle humidity, I can handle being hungry, I can handle cramped spaces, but I cannot handle constant annoying noise! I wanted to strangle her."
Pot, meet kettle.

"I don't like stereotypes, but they usually have some truthful basis. There's one I don't get: ASIAN GIRLS AREN'T GOOD IN BED! I fuck and fuck 'em but they do nothing for me!"
They do nothing because it's probably tiny, yellow, and gross; they know it won't be filling, much less satisfying.

"This one girl! I was fucking her and she had an orgasm and she fucking passed out! She was like, 'Ohh, you're the best!" Meanwhile I'm thinking I didn't even fuck your brains out!"
She wanted it to end. We do that when we want you to stop.

And so when I said to my parents, "God, that guy was awful - so tasteless!" my dad replied in blend of Chinese and Thai, "You know what he is? He's a goddamn faggot."